Kazumi and Todd Baglee
Bonds of love

In each issue of jstyle we introduce two people who embody the "Japan-Australia" spirit.

Text and photographs courtesy of Todd Baglee

I suppose the first question most people ask any couple would be where they first met. The way we met is not that different from anyone else, more the odds of it occurring. Thinking about it we would say it may have been luck, serendipity, or maybe just fate. I was living in the beautifully historical rural city of Kanazawa on the west coast of Japan's main island of Honshu. I had been in Japan just shy of a year. A friend and co-worker, Jen, was returning to England and having a farewell party.

She had left my company a few months before and had been working in a children's language school. She casually invited all her co-workers for drinks. To be honest I was not going to stay long because it had been an exhausting week. While sitting with Jen reminiscing, some of her Japanese colleagues from the other company walked over to wish her farewell and a have a chat.

We were introduced and I was captivated. This was a rare, one-off occurrence for me. Although we came from completely different backgrounds I found we had a fair bit in common. Music, movies, work...from then on I couldn't get her out of mind. It took a second meeting and some time to pluck up the courage to ask her out, though to be honest she did not really remember me clearly when I called. Like I said it took a little time. Kazumi later told me she was about to go home after a long day at work before the farewell party but a friend told her of the get-together and dragged her along.

After almost a year of teaching and sightseeing, I was in the midst of deciding whether to move to Hokkaido (the northern island of Japan) or return home. This decision seemed to just fade away. When I left Australia in mid 1999, I promised my parents I would be back in a year. It was 2004 and after being married for about two years Kazumi and I moved to Australia!

In Japan we lived in the same small town as her parents, two beautiful people who took me into their family without hesitation and made living away from my own family so much easier. On one occasion I got stuck in traffic returning home. The snow and wind were horrendous. It was usually a 15-minute, eight-kilometre drive and on that day it took about nine hours to get home. Kazumi's mum kept calling her to see if I was home and was so concerned she cooked us dinner. A wonderfully gracious lady.

Living in Australia now, Kazumi is experiencing the same situation with my family, obviously without the snow. Our first Christmas has come only a few months after moving - not the white Christmas we had in Japan but more the mid to high 30s of December in the Southern Hemisphere. From the time she got off the plane it was as if she had known my family for years, which has helped us both adjusting to living in Australia. We even have a small herd of cows on the family farm my mum and dad look after. Our families have definitely helped us both adjust to living in their respective countries

Like any marriage, it is not always smooth sailing. Occasionally the differences between us can create obstacles as we try to understand each other but they also are a great source of learning and reflection. I think our mutual understanding not only derives from the experience of living in each other's country, learning the language, enjoying the food, and laughing at the same things, but in finding a best friend with whom to share life.

I feel that our own shared experiences of living and travelling together in Japan and Australia are our private reference point to which we can relate and the different backgrounds and points of view we bring provide boundless opportunities to learn and enjoy life together, which we wish for all.